Thursday, 30 August 2012

Home Alone

Evertime I step foot in the door i’m controlled by my fears. As the door slams shut and the outside world disappears my Fear and I go head to head in the ring.
Fear jeers at me, pummeling me into the ground, mocking my plans and dreams, goading me into giving up -exclaiming that I’ll never succeed!
Fear morphs itself into failure, trapping me in a votex which I can’t seem to escape from and slowly sucks me into its deep abyss.
At least when i’m outside Fear is kept at bay, swallowed up by the bright city lights and by the racket of passers by. It offers me respite for a little while.
Nevertheless I have to make my way home. I can’t escape forever.
 I find myself alone. 

These four walls refuse to give me solace. I think and think and tear away at myself; giving into the doubts that haunt me every night.
Once again, Fear creeps into my heart and embeds itself effortlessly into my soul. The word ‘Failure’ springs out and once again the battle commences.
Maybe soon I’ll escape it. Maybe one day I’ll stand up to it. But at this very moment I give into my fears 
and Failure finds itself branded upon my head.

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